Exposition on the English Language

Are you speaking English?

Speaker: A mature gentleman, possibly a Lord or Earl of some description, well educated.

Audience: Studying teenagers (14-18 years old).

Setting: School room / lecture theatre.

Who remembers George Bernard Shaw’s My Fair Lady? Eliza Doolittle, the gutter girl protagonist, who developed such a misrepresentation, such an abomination of the English Language… She was a girl who redefined the idea of verbal class distinction by identifying a new low on its scale of laziness. Eliza is a perfect example of a murderer, a murderer of the English tongue.

You see, from my observations, it is clear that there is a myriad of English dialects, having a profound way of abusing the very essentials of English communication: fluidity, annunciation, influence and most of all, a plethora of well developed diction.

Now, when I talk about the English Language, many would immediately think of the Queen’s English, but have little understanding of its most identifiable elements; correct grammar, an intricate word selection and social intercourse. In fact many argue, out of ignorance, that the Queen’s English is drowning in a sea fuelled by an international modernisation of communication, a language receding into the pages of history. But they’d be wrong. In fact it remains a paramount part of the active progression of humanity. We can see it in areas of law, politics and education - for example, there is no other way for university lecturers to convey information to tutor their pupils. If we cannot maintain an understanding of the Queen’s English, society as a whole will devolve exponentially.

This specific English dialect has also been given a somewhat unpopular wrap, as it were, for being associated with the English upper-crust. The only reason why the Queen’s English is now only identified with the upper-class of England is purely because they’re educated. Schools by the likes of Eton, Harrow, Fettes and Winchester are strict, no nonsense institutions with an aim to build mentally strong and well respected Englishmen. These schools thrive on having the ability to converse with the utmost sophistication, not only showing their dedication to the preservation of the Queen’s English but to the practice of this dialect as well, as it is one of the most important elements of maintaining a successful career, stimulating a responsible and intuitive appearance.

Take America, a civilisation espousing freedom of speech, founding the failure of the Queen’s English. Authentication of this accusation lies in one of their most vulgar misconceptions of basic grammar. Conjunctions. Or in this case, the lack of them. Now any educated Englishman would have no quarrel with the pronunciation of linking words such as; and, or, but, although - and at the same time, using them fluidly to convey a message. However, the USA has been able to get away with leaving out these quintessential words. For Example; “One hundred and four” in English, but in American, “One hundred - four”, in English “I’ll come to watch” and “I’ll come - watch” in American. Their lazy little ways soon prevailed, taking over the modern world. Unable to escape America’s influence and constantly being bombarded with business jargon and promotions, their media and the arts - society, especially our future leaders  - subject to their influence - , began to accept this revolutionary form of English. However most importantly, the USA seem to neglect the fact that they are putting their own success at risk, reinforcing their stereotypical lazy appearance.

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