The Manchurian Cndidate

In the fourth essay that we were assigned, we had to compare and contrast the Manchurian Candidate's original novel and movie adaptation. In the current essay we were told to choose a past essay and critique it. I chose to critique this essay because I found that there were crucial mistakes that I made which could have been changed.

The expressed purpose of critiquing the essay "Comparison and contrast of The Manchurian Candidate book and movie" was to show that a majority of books which had been made into movies were indeed altered for purposes of entertainment which in turn made the movie worse. When creating the films, the director would eliminate scenes and sometimes greatly alter the storyline in order to make the plot more exciting or just because the director did not have enough time to shoot a specific scene. The director intended to attract a larger audience than the book attracted. When writing this essay, the purpose was to show that the movie being altered made the movie less vital. My intended goal was to show the main differences as well as similarities between the 1962 novel: The Manchurian Candidate by Richard Condon and the 1962 movie directed by John Frankenhiemer.

In order for an essay to be written well and coherently one must not deviate from the topic. One must express oneself well enough to hold the interest of the reader. It also needs to be written in an organized manner and coherent enough to get one's point across. I attempted to follow the implied suggestions in order to make my critique logical, coherent and concise.

I felt that the essence of my essay was fairly strong. When I broke the essay down into details, it seemed to lack importance due to the details being vague. Another problem was the use of my mechanics. I had a serious problem with pronoun usage. Sometimes my pronouns didn't clarify the person to whom they referred. In the previous essay I wrote: "This shows that she thought that she was a threat to her and she wanted Raymond to herself." This is a serious problem because it does not clearly state whom I am talking about, which can confuse the reader. This could be fixed by saying "This indicates that she considered herself a threat to her very self. She was determined to have Raymond for herself." Without the proper usage, the sentence will not make sense. When I use a pronoun, I have to be more specific as to the noun to which I am referring. Saying "they" several times only tends to confuse the reader. To whom are you referring? Use the noun instead. Many of these grammatical mistakes can be fixed by rereading what I wrote. The more we reread what we have written, the more aware we become of our errors. Also allowing someone else to critique our writing can be most enlightening and rewarding, too. Sometimes in rereading our works we fail to perceive the errors therein.

Another error in my essay was that I did